Affairs, Adultery & Spying High-Profile Cases

Top 5 Questions About Adultery and Divorce in Ontario

Top 5 Questions About Adultery and Divorce in Ontario

It seems that celebrity gossip tabloids will never have a shortage of topics to cover, as long as there are stories about extramarital affairs by successful, high-profile celebrities. Most recently, it has been alleged that Arnold Schwartzenegger fathered a child with the housekeeper employed in the home he shared with his wife of 25 years; prior to that, Tiger Woods has admitted to having sexual trysts with at least 14 women outside of his relatively short marriage.

Leaving aside the intriguing question of how adultery affects couples psychologically and emotionally (and why such powerful, successful people would jeopardize their marital relationships in this manner), the legal effect of adultery is quite clear.

In Ontario (as elsewhere in Canada), the laws relating to divorce based on a adultery are governed by the federal Divorce Act, which provides that a “breakdown of a marriage is established only if the spouses have lived separate and apart for at least one year or the spouse against whom the divorce proceeding is brought has committed adultery or treated the other spouse with physical or mental cruelty.” (Note that it must be the other party who commits the act: a spouse cannot apply for a divorce based on his or her own adultery).

Adultery, then, is one of the established grounds for divorce in Canada. Questions often arise as to the whether the duration, extent or nature of the adultery matters when it comes to the right to obtain a divorce. Here are some common questions answered in this regard:

1) Does it matter how long the affair was going on?

No. Provided that it can be proven that adultery has been committed by one of the spouses, the other spouse can ask for a divorce. However, it should be noted that the adultery must have occurred before the petition for divorce is brought.

2) What if the extramarital sex occurred only a single time? What if the spouse is remorseful?

A single act of adultery is a sufficient basis on which to bring a divorce action. And technically speaking, as long as the adultery was committed by one of the spouses, the other spouse has legal grounds under the Divorce Act to proceed with a petition. Whether or not the spouse actually wants to do so, in light of prospects of forgiveness and reconciliation, will be a personal decision.

3) Do you need clear proof of an affair? Is it enough to suspect that something is going on?

In order to prove adultery, there is no prerequisite that the other spouse gets “caught in the act,” or that there be photos or other physical evidence of the affair. Instead – as with all civil actions – a court must be satisfied on a “preponderance” of credible evidence that adultery has taken place. (For example see Nelles v. Nelles).

This can take place by inference, i.e. where the facts and circumstances lead to the reasonable conclusion that adultery has indeed taken place. However, a mere suspicion of adultery is not enough, nor is evidence that the other spouse had the opportunity to cheat (see Doucette v. Doucette). Also, there is no requirement that the party with whom the adultery is taking place must be named or identified.

Finally, it is the spouse who wants to bring the divorce action who must bring forward the convincing evidence that adultery actually took place. There is nothing unusual about the type of evidence required; however, the evidence will be considered sufficient if the adulterous spouse admits to the affair (see for example d’Entremont v. d’Entremont), or if the third party with whom the spouse is having the affair gives evidence attesting to the fact (see Vickers v. Vickers).

4) What if the husband had an affair with another man? Or the wife cheats with another woman? Does that count?

Yes. Historically, Canada’s Divorce Act defined adultery along the same lines as the former definition of “spouses”, which involved only people of the opposite sex. Adultery was similarly defined by the courts as consisting of voluntary sex outside of marriage, between a spouse and someone of the opposite gender.

However, both the definition of “spouse” and the concept of adultery has been expanded by the courts to encompass same-sex relationships. In a 2005 case called P. (S.E.) v. P. (D.D.) a B.C. woman was granted a divorce after it was shown that the husband had committed adultery by having an affair with another man.

5) What about cheating over the Internet?

In order to qualify as “adultery”, there must be an actual, physical sexual relationship between one of the spouses and a third party to the marriage. Phone sex and other forms of sexually-charged activity – if conducted “from a distance”, so to speak – do not generally qualify as “adultery” as that term is used in the Divorce Act.


Although these cases are often interesting and quite sad, for most family law practioners in Ontario these circumstances do not form the basis for thier clients’ divorce claims.  The Court does not want spouses to focus on fault and blame but rather resolution.  For the most part, blame does not improve or diminish one’s property rights or entitlement to share family property in Ontario.  And the practical reality is that an Application for divorce based on cruelty or adultery may take a few years before the matter is finally determined if a full hearing is required.  If this is the case then the party seeking the divorce could also likely rely on the fact that s/he has lived separate and apart for one year and use this as the basis for the divorce claim.

For the full-text of the decisions, see:

P. (S.E.) v. P. (D.D.), 2005 CarswellBC 2137, 2005 BCSC 1290 (B.C. S.C.)

Nelles v. Nelles (1971), 2 R.F.L. 153 (Ont. H.C.)

Doucette v. Doucette (1986), 73 N.B.R. (2d) 407 (Q.B.)

d’Entremont v. d’Entremont (1992), 44 R.F.L. (3d) 224 (C.A.)

Vickers v. Vickers (1976), 24 R.F.L. 303 (B.C. S.C.)

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About the author

Russell Alexander

Russell Alexander is the Founder & Senior Partner of Russell Alexander Collaborative Family Lawyers.