More people are representing themselves in family law matters—sometimes by choice, sometimes by necessity. Self-representation can save costs but also brings procedural traps and legal risks. The key is preparation: knowing courtroom etiquette, deadlines, available resources, and when to get targeted legal help. This guide gives pragmatic advice for self-represented litigants and explains how to combine self-help with professional assistance.
When to Consider Self-Representation
Self-representation is reasonable for straightforward, low-conflict matters with clear facts and limited legal complexity. However, high-conflict cases, complex financial issues, or safety concerns often require a lawyer’s help.
Benefits and Challenges of Going Solo
Benefits: reduced legal fees, direct control, learning the process.
Challenges: navigating rules of evidence and procedure, meeting deadlines, drafting enforceable orders, and managing court appearances.
Preparing Your Case Thoroughly
- Organize documents (financials, communications, parenting schedules).
- Use court guides and templates—courthouses and court websites publish checklists and forms.
- Practice your oral submissions and know the key issues you need to prove. The Ontario Courts have specific guides for self-represented family litigants that explain appearances, required documents, and court conduct. Ontario Courts
Key Courtroom Etiquette and Procedures (Do’s)
- Be punctual and dress respectfully.
- Bring organized bundles of documents for the judge and the other party.
- Address the judge politely and follow courtroom directions.
- File and serve all documents on time.
Common Don’ts for Self-Represented Litigants
- Don’t ignore court rules or deadlines.
- Don’t use abusive or inflammatory language in court filings or at hearings.
- Don’t assume informal agreements are enforceable without written orders.
How to Use Limited-Scope or “Unbundled” Legal Help
A practical middle path is limited-scope retainers (paying a lawyer to help with specific tasks—drafting an affidavit, preparing for a hearing, or reviewing documents). Many lawyers and clinics provide unbundled services so you can handle parts of the case yourself and consult a lawyer for high-risk stages.
Resources and Where to Get Help
- Ontario Courts’ guides for self-represented family litigants (forms, rules, and courtroom expectations). Ontario Courts
- Law Society and local legal clinics for referrals, duty counsel, and limited-scope services.
Q: Is it possible to meet in the middle and self-rep for part then consult with a lawyer when I need to?
Yes — a hybrid approach is common and often wise. Use self-representation for routine filings and administrative steps, and hire a lawyer for critical tasks (complex negotiations, trial preparation, or contested hearings). Discuss “limited scope” options with a lawyer so expectations and responsibilities are clear. Law Society of Ontario greatguides.lso.ca
Self-representation demands discipline, preparation, and an honest assessment of risk. With the right resources, a clear plan, and targeted legal help when needed, many people successfully navigate parts of the family justice system on their own. Consider attending pro bono legal help days to get free advice and guidance for your next steps.
Join our free webinar, Dos and Don’ts of Self-Representation, on November 18 at 5PM ET and learn which parts of your case you can safely handle and when you should call a lawyer. Ontario Courts
